The Need for a Mom

Some days are heavy. They just are. My six kids and wonderful husband are treasures, but the momming thing, it’s a exercise in sacrifice. It stretches us, renews us, and exhausts every single cell in our beings.

As I left the house to watch the IF Gathering with a group of women at church, I found myself weighed down by an interaction I’d had with one of my younger kiddos. It wasn’t anything odd or unusual, but for some reason, I was impacted more at this moment.

My own deep needs were taking over my attitude and my enthusiasm. I ached for the thing I no longer had, a mother, someone to tell me I was doing a good job.

I’ve had three women step bravely into this role in my life. The abundance of those blessings is not missed on me for minute, but all three have gone on to live out their reward in Heaven. Hopefully, it’s not because I wore them out. My grandmother, stepmother, and mentor all made impacts on my life, investing in me, and shaping my heart into one that could love more like they did.

As I sat through deep and meaningful teaching, my mind mediated on the friends I’ve been blessed with. People who have not and will not leave me even when my mess overflows. We are a community, a therapy group, a source of generously given prayers. When I’m under a pile of pressure, they step in and start shoveling.

Most of us will outlive our mothers. We’re meant to. But we’re also designed to live in tight connection with others. Find your people. This matters.

Carry each other’s burdens, and in this way you will fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:2 NIV

Shaped by the Waves tells the story of a woman struggling to understand her changing world as she loses the only mother she’s ever known.

Christina Suzann Nelson is an inspirational speaker and award-winning author of six books, including More Than We Remember, What Happens Next, and the Christy Award-winning The Way It Should Be. She is the mother of six children and is passionate about helping others find hope after trauma.

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